"The problem here is a totalitarian uniformity, a cult-like mentality such that even allies are enemies if they fail to follow the Exact Party Line. " - Phyllis Chesler

Sunday, June 8, 2008

I Told My Mother About Sadie

Well, I emailed Mom and told her about Sadie. I received the following reply:
"you are correct - you're a grown woman. it's your call. she's cute - good luck."

In my mother's language that is code for: I disapprove but can do nothing about it as you do whatever the eff you want as always. And then adds the good luck, to attempt to sound supportive and happy for me so I can't call her on it.

And even though this Tuesday I am turning 37 (yes that is my shameless plug for birthday wishes from my readers) I still hate Mom's dissaproval. Shhh...NEVER let her know that!

7 comments:

leezee52 said...

I know it hurts when a parent doesn't approve of some of the things you do...maybe in time she will when you show her the sweet photos of little Sadie Boo.... Remember we are here for you!

One Crazy Chick! said...

I am deliberately selective regarding what I tell my father or not and how I choose to do so because his disapproval eats at me for weeks no for months after the disapproval. I hate that I let him do that to me.

Candid Carrie said...

Hey, put up a poll-thingy and then we can give you actual statistics of our support.

P.S. I have two cats that my mom doesn't even know about so who am I to talk so big ;)

A New Yorker said...

Leezee52, not sure if it hurts, but it does bother me, and I wish it didn't. BUT it won't stop me either and learning that I have to do what feels right for me is a BIG lesson in life that we all must get to at one point or another. It's so nice to know I have support blog friends like yourself though.
:-D

Kandace, yes I am that way too. But this one feels too big not to tell. And plus my brother kind of has a big mouth and will be here soon and in September they are going to visit me after my brother's wedding...so one way or the other she would have found out.

It bothered me for a few hours. They I put myself together and got the "fuck it" attitude (pardon my language if you don't like that word)

Candace, Oh I can hear my mother now.. "I don't give a shit what anyone else thinks...blah blah blah." But it seems you do understand;-)

MYM said...

lol ... yeah, she doesn't know ;) I used to be like that too, until about the age of 35 or something, then I just cut those last few apron strings and spoke & responded to my mother like I would any other woman of her age. Of course I still loved her, she was/is my mother, but I didn't take everything she said as if it was attached to a shit-load of history. Not easy to do trust me! But remember, you're mom has/had a mother too ... and most likely had the same issues with her. It's eternal! :)

Karen said...

Well Lauren I am 48 and still let my mother do the same thing to me. I took up smoking again (I know shame on me) after stopping for 9 years...long story. I want to give up but haven't managed it yet. My mother still doesn't know and I will go to extraordinary lengths to see that she never does.

Hope that makes you feel better.

A New Yorker said...

Gypsy, Yeah sometimes I can just feel it in the pit of my stomach when it comes to mom. So I wait, like I did now, and then hit her with it, let the chips fall where they may and let her stew for a little. Usually it blows over and after a small beating she comes over to my side. I am training her!