"The problem here is a totalitarian uniformity, a cult-like mentality such that even allies are enemies if they fail to follow the Exact Party Line. " - Phyllis Chesler

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Maybe there's a whole generation of men who have a genetic disorder causing doucheness?? Part II

Part Two:

There's very few things that can rile me up. But lying to me and trying to get over absolutely flips my switch. You'll never see a faster can of woop ass be brought out than if I feel you've crossed me and try to act like I'm stupid.

So as you know I was to be on a first date with a guy I met through Twitter but also Jdate, as I write this post.

I requested on Saturday that he email me the location for our date on for Sunday so that I could prepare accordingly.

I recieved an email reply from him simply stating he couldn't remember the name of the place and would tell me early on Sunday morning.

When it was almost 11 am and I had to get to a class not too long after, I composed an email to cancel the date. As I was about to hit the send button I received a text from this 45 year old boy with the location we were to meet.

Key things to remember as this post is long and detailed:
When he found me on Twitter he mentioned to me that he did have a Jdate profile but he thought he had hidden it because he was not a paid member at the moment. Subsequently he was logged into his account daily. That's a lot for someone who's profile is hidden and not active on Jdate. Hmmm

Keep in mind he told me that his mother lives in Upstate NY somewhere near Nyack.

Now I did have to cancel and reschedule meeting him during the week due to a client calling me to do a job that paid very well. And it turned out that client cancelled on me at the last minute.
However I called IMMEDIATELY when this happened and gave him a days notice to boot!

But I believe in signs and that was one of many.

Here is what I wrote and almost sent in the morning.

I'm writing this email to wish you the best of luck with your search for love. I honestly do not feel that the chemistry is right between us.

I was excited to learn of a Jewish man who lived near me with the same political leanings. It was and is nice to know you exist. I'm glad we met each other through twitter for that reason.

However, I've noticed that you log on to JDATE every day although you claim to not be a member anymore and even went so far as to state you hid your profile. It's obvious that is not the case and that you are corresponding with or have already started to date someone you met through the site. And it's obvious that you feel more of a connection there and are paying that woman the proper attention you are not paying me. No worries. It's not meant to be.

I think you need someone who is more "corportate" than I am. I'm just not the kind of girl.

If you're still reading...I'd like to say the following things to you about our twitter exchanges and your comments about my career:I was a bit put off by your pushiness about how I should or should not promote myself. We have never met. It's not your place to impose like that. Being the kind person I am I wrote back gently that I thought it was cute how much you cared and your response was rather conceited. There was no humility which I found rather shocking.

You then took it further upon yourself to tell me I should have a twitter professional name and where I should market myself etc...Besides the obvious rudeness of these things to be saying to me, someone you've never met before, I realized clearly that it comes from a place of need for you to find a women who makes a lot of money and be a powerhouse. I'm clearly not the right woman for you. I'm not interested in being the bread winner. I work a lot because I need to and I love the jobs I do, but a powerhouse I am not nor ever will be and I have accepted that about me a long time ago.

I also know that I cannot be with a man who wants to make me into something else. He has to accept me for me and respect who I am and the person I am and will be and love it good bad or ugly.

It may not have been your intent but to leave me hanging for the place and time was the final thing in a list that I was seeing in a pattern of rudeness. Yes, I had to cancel on you but I called you immediately to speak with you about it. THAT is kindness and respect. THAT is what a good person does.

I found it shocking and rude the way you answered your phone that day that I had to call to speak with you about the plans. Who answers the phone: Who is this?

Your lack of information in a timely manner for today obviously comes out of hesitancy and stringing me along because of a date you had last night that I suspect ran into today. I could be wrong but that isn't the issue anyway. The chemistry is off. You knew I had plans today and you knew I could have worked tonight yet I took the night off to meet you for dinner which you asked for. You wrote me that you'd tell me early on Sunday. It's almost noon, and to me that's not early. And that you are not even thinking that I might percieve it that way and only thinking about how you feel about time etc...shows me a lack of chemistry and respect.

I was about to send this email to you this morning but you sent me the text with the location. And I regret that I didn't send this to you regardles after your ridiculous bike story today.

BTW single women at my age are not stupid, or desperate...we hear well and remember well. Your mother lives in NY as you told me not NJ as you stated today. You biked in the park, but suddenly you're in NJ. And even if it is true, the fact that you're in NJ biking only hours before you are to have a first date with a woman shows incredibly poor judgement.

The email was sent as I arrived home from my class Sunday evening. Even though this "man" knew I had a class I'd be involved in he disturbed me by calling and texting me. What was the problem only 2.5 hours before we were to meet? He was hit while riding his bike and couldn't decide if he needed stitches.


Even if I believed this bullshit story, it only would say that this man has very poor judgement to be biking so close to a date. Even if I believed his lie about first biking in the park and then switching to NJ where his mother lives...it shows bad judgment to be in NJ just before you are supposed to be on a date with me.

But let me be clear. I don't buy one iota of this retarded story! YES folks I said retarded. If the fucking president can get away with it so can I! ;)

I'm done with this part of my life...letting men who really have no interest in me string me along with insane stories of why they cannot be here or there but can we yet again set up another time.



Babs (Beetle) said...

This just proves to me that to go searching is not the best way to find a partner. Just live your life and he will probably pop up when least expected :O)

Da Old Man said...

Pretty lame, really. You'd think a guy in his 40's would be able to concoct better lies.

Lauren said...

@babs- was just doing that and he popped up. In RL if rarely JUST happens. That's a myth. Oh wells.

@DOM- LMAO love where your thoughts go. TEEHEE.

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Glad you waved bye bye to him. He didn't sound like much of anything but trouble.

Lauren said...

@Mary-Thank you for your support. I agree of course but some in RL thought I was too hard on him about the bike stuff. I'm with you! Thanks for popping by. checked out your blog too. Very nice!