"The problem here is a totalitarian uniformity, a cult-like mentality such that even allies are enemies if they fail to follow the Exact Party Line. " - Phyllis Chesler

Monday, May 12, 2008

My Sister-In-Law's Bridal Shower

I am fulfilling my blog reading obligations and finally got around to The Junk Drawer today.

Kathy wrote about the silly gifts people register for. I found her post ironic because I just finished buying bridal shower gifts for my sister in law. My brother is getting married on August 31, 2008.

The bro and I have never been very close and I barely know his bride. I have met her three times and she seems very pleasant and nice. But seriously what do you get for someone you barely know and have little relationship with. What are the obligations?

My mother thinks I should be buying something off their gift registry. I lean more to the sentiment that Kathy writes about. Most of the time people sign up for things they would never buy for themselves, are wacky expensive and will end up in the couple's closets.

But to go past that, my brother is 34 and has been living on his own since college. His bride just sold her condo to move in with him and put all her items in storage. So why am I buying them more stuff?

It used to be that men and women married much younger, often right out of their parents homes and had nothing. Wedding gifts were to help the happy couple get started.

My brother and his fiance have two of everything now. They just put all her stuff in storage and are selling his place and buying a town home.

I know my gifts, which I have purposely not disclosed to my mother, makes her nervous. Will I embarras her? Oh such a horror for mom!

This is what I decided to do. I bought a really pretty decorated box from Laytners and inside are a few things just for the bride. Everything has a symbolic meaning.

1- a blue garter for their first day and dance as husband and wife, fulfilling the something blue nonsense
2- a gift certificate to Victorias Secret (because buying the items for her is just too icky to think about -- this is my brother's fiance we are talking about folks)
3- a pretty photo holder that says "I Do" tastefully for their first photo as husband and wife
4- a red pouch from Layla Rowe to hold their first monies together, often collected at the wedding as gifts
5 - a blue bead bracelet also from Layla Rowe, so she always has something pretty to wear just for her
6- a ceramic serving dish for appetizers (so they always have food on their table)
7- a pregnancy book by Ina May Gaskin that every expecting mother should read, before she becomes pregnant
8- and last but certainly not least... EAR PLUGS (for their first fight)

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's a really neat idea! Especially the ear plug! lol

A New Yorker said...

Hey Kim, nice to see you stop by!!! YES, I know my brother and I would bet good money that gift will be the most used. HA!

swilek said...

very creative idea....i know i would love a gift like that!!! i can relate to your story so it put a smile on my face!! happy monday!

Anonymous said...
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Karen said...

Those sound like very personal and thoughtful ideas Lauren. You're absolutely right that they probably already have way too many household items as putting one lot in storage would indicate. I would love to receive any one of those things and I'm sure your mum would approve....well except for maybe the ear plugs....newlyweds don't fight do they :)

Kathy said...

Your gift ideas are genius! So thoughtful and memorable. Beats a waffle maker, that's for sure!

A New Yorker said...

HEY Karyne, With all my faults, I have always had a knack for creative gift giving :-) It's totally freaking out mom. She is pretting to be supportive of my non-convential idea but I know better. HA! It's so nice to hear all this support in favor of the gifts.

Gypsy, not sure if they fight YET. But that can only last for so long. Now that they are living together the beast will appear. I have been on the wrong end of my brothers temper. The earplugs are probably the most important gift of them all. HEEHEEHEE!

Mom might not agree with the earplugs, but she probably wishes she had a pair of her own. :-S

A New Yorker said...

Kathy, sorry I forgot ya in my reply...oh heck yeah it beats a waffle maker. And I think that was one of the things on their list. :-)

Candid Carrie said...

I have no idea how I got over to your blog, but your bridal shower gift was really cute. I like the way that you took pictures of it closed and then open. I agree about intimate gifts being best, I laughed out loud about the VS gift card and not thinking about your brother "doing it" ... good read, cute template (just like mine) indicates you have good taste :)

A New Yorker said...

Carrie, Glad you found me. Hope to see you here many times.

Great minds think alike!

MYM said...

HA! The ear plugs are classic :) I think that's a wonderful gift! So much better than something off the registery, as you say.

A New Yorker said...

Hey Drowsey, Didn't see your comment before...yes those darn earplugs are going to save her one day!!! BRUUUUUHAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Anonymous said...

The pregnancy book is a NOT a good idea. Seriously, you shouldn't be pushing the pregnancy thing when maybe they don't want to have kids, can't have kids, or just aren't ready to think about kids. Stick to bridal/newlywed only gifts...NOT kid related gifts. Save that for the baby shower.

ariel and bellas mommy said...

WOW! Thank You for this post! I am in the EXACT situation! Im close to my brother, but BARELY know his bride to be, she moved into his house and they have a garage FULL of extra stuff...anyway, her shower is TONIGHT and all ive accomplished is picking out a card! haha I may steal a little of your idea and do some last minute shopping this afternoon! :-)