"The problem here is a totalitarian uniformity, a cult-like mentality such that even allies are enemies if they fail to follow the Exact Party Line. " - Phyllis Chesler

Monday, November 17, 2008

Mail Bag Mondays 2

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too".
Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is.
Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that? " No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.


8. When people say "life is short".
What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?"
If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

11 comments:

Coffee Slut said...

I laughed so hard my coffee shot out of my nose!
Have a great Monday!

Kathy said...

Bless you. #4 could not be any more stupid. I feel like I just got so much off my chest, and I didn't even write that. Thank you!

Speedcat Hollydale said...

What Time Is It?

Swirl Girl said...

how true, how true!

(looking at un-watched wrist right about now...)

Babs (Beetle) said...

Soooo funny! #4 is my top pick!!

Why only 9? I bet you could find more :O)

A New Yorker said...

You guys are funny..Babs...I didn't write these silly. These were sent to me via email. Mailbags...get it :) I wish I were this funny. :(

Jessica said...

9 is one of mine! Ugh!

Da Old Man said...

Good list. Hard to pick a favorite.

lot 2 learn said...

# 5 and # 6 are the best I think. Great list

swilek said...

you are funny:) I love the honesty of Americans:)

Anonymous said...

That was hilarious. I love sarcasm in humour and use it every chance I get. Thanks for the giggle.